| Roast Goose War | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| |||||||
| Belligerents | |||||||
|
Offensive: Finland, Russia |
Defensive: Norway, Germany | ||||||
| Commanders and Leaders | |||||||
|
Offense Leaders: Luimnigh, General Vlaktim |
Defense Leaders: Olaf, Pen Par | ||||||
| Strength | |||||||
|
Offensive: Over 50,000 soldiers |
Defensive: Unknown | ||||||
| Casualties and Losses | |||||||
| Military Casualties: Negligible
Civilian Casualties: Negligible |
Military Casualties: 35,000 Norwegian Soldiers; Significant Portions of the German Navy
Civilian Casualties: 10,000 (Burning of Tromso) | ||||||
The Roast Goose War came in-between the German-Finnish Tensions and the Voided War and was famous for how long it was, without any significant results.
Beginnings of an Invasion[]
In 2067, Finnish planes performed reconnaissance operations near their border with Norway, where they discovered between 550 to 1840 military personnel without any artillery securing the border.
Finland then made the ludicrous assertion that it was an invasion force and declared war on Norway. The forces they sent amounted to 40 multiroles, 75 tanks, 750 artillery pieces and 550 armored personnel carriers and infantry fighting vehicles. An unknown number of soldiers were in the fighting vehicles.
Germany offered to assist Norway in the war, but Norway declined, which would reveal itself to be a tragic mistake.
Meanwhile, the Finnish deployed ten trucks with FOAB bombs in them into Norway. However, the bombs never detonated, due to insufficient pressure to detonate. Further, several problems were found with the concept of using trucks as military escorts secretively.
Norway then retaliated for these attacks by attacking the Finnish with non-existent planes and virtually non-existent artillery while mobilizing three divisions. Troops on the border were given the virtually impossible orders of ambushing the invasion force.
Finnish troops easily passed the border and marched onward to Tromso with negligible casualties.
Rovaniemi[]
During the border onslaught, Norway ordered a military division into Rovanheim, Finland. However, the city in question did not exist. It was generally assumed that Rovaniemi was meant.
One possible route taken by Norway. Notice that they never reached Rovaniemi.
Additionally, Norway sent logging crews to accompany the division, to take Finnish lumber.
Finland sent 50 infantry fighting vehicles, 20 multiroles, 25 tanks and 200 artillery units to defeat the division. Due to a lack of aerial support, the Nowegians suffered 80% casualties at Rovaniemi.
Norway then attempted to return the one tree they chopped down.
Tromso[]
Due to vague instructions on how to take the city, Finnish troops encamped Tromso for an unusually long period. Norway took advantage of this and began the evacuation of the city, while sending two of the three divisions they organized to camp on a ridge near the Finnish encampment, to begin an engagement.
Finland sent the remainder of their offensive to engage the two divisons. Due to air support, Finland easily crushed the Norwegian defenders. Only 12,000 of the original 20,000 survived the retreat to Skjelnan, making the attack beyond catastrophic.
After disabling explosives on the bridges into Tromso, the city, weakened from sending troops stationed there to the Second and Third Divisions, capitulated.
Meanwhile, Finnish airplanes dropped anti-runway bombs on Norwegian airports to disrupt the transport of goods by air, after being counseled by Egypt to do so.
A map depicting where anti-runway bombs were dropped.
After Troms[]
At this time, Norway sued for peace, but their request was ignored by the Finnish, who were more concerned with advancing.
25 tanks, 85 infantry fighting vehicles, 10 artillery units and 10 airplanes were then advanced to secure the bridges at Finnsnes and Gryllefjord, so as to cut off a considerable part of Norway from Norwegian control. However, the operation was never executed as they were never told how to get to the islands.
Meanwhile, the helpless Norwegians were ordering the totally defeated Rovaniemi division to return to Norway, the weakened troops at Skjelnan to cut off supply routes into Troms and were congratulating themselves over ambushes that never happened. Before the Finnish could respond, the troops at Skjelnan were ordered to burn the area near Troms to the ground, in violation of the Geneva Convetion.
After that, Norway ordered a brigade to ambush small groups of military units leaving Troms and to lay mines in the area. For the fourth time, a lack of air support was the undoing of the Norwegians.
Peace?[]
Finland proceeded to write extraordinarily lopsided surrender conditions, including Finland being able to install a puppet government in Norway. Egypt then proposed a slightly less harsh set of surrender conditions that was designed to further Egyptian interests in the region rather than negotiate peace. Needless to say, they did not go well.
Germany then offered to send reinforcements into Norway, when the war was almost over. Egypt threatened to support Finland if Germany did so.
Norway ignored the German offer and sent up 20 fighters to support another brigade they got to perform the ambushes.
Regardless, Germany mustered their troops to war.
German Involvement[]
The Germans began by announcing the completion of repairs to Norwegian infrastructure, a project which they never began. They then sent 50,000 men, 120 tanks, 45 artillery units, 60 ‘tank destroyers’ and 150 personal carriers to Finnsnes to counter the Finnish there. However, the Finnish never made it to Finnsnes.
They then sent a group of twenty-six unidentifiable planes, one of which was a bomber, to drop two thermobaric bombs on the Finnish encampments at Finnsnes. Again however, the Finnish never arrived at Finnsnes. Other planes dropped supplies for the trapped Norwegians, even though none of the Norwegians were trapped.
The Germans then sent other planes and aircraft defenses called MTHEL’s to Norway, but the Germans never gave them further orders, causing them to languish there.
Germany then had their navy attack the Finnish Navy and aircraft defense system. Lastly, Germany asked NATO for assistance, however NATO refused, which eventually led to Germany leaving it. For now though, all it would cause is Germany to request a ceasefire.
The Finnish chose that moment to respond to the German forces. They had their navy attack the German Navy head on while they ordered their army to take Finnsnes, even though they never got their troops there to begin with. The ground troops at Tromso, meanwhile, were split between a retreat and holding the city, bizarrely.
Germany then sent submarine backup for their navy, while fighters launched from German carriers were to shoot down the non-existent spy planes. Germany also diverts a fleet to go to the Norwegian Sea and prepares to defend Finnsnes, which is under absolutely no attack. Then, despite having sent all of their ships to fight the Irish ones, Germany sends those ships in the Baltic Sea into the North Sea.
Russian Involvement[]
Angry over how the war had disrupted its trade, Russia sent its military against the German, Norwegian and Finnish militaries. Submarines and carriers were brought out on the reenactment of Jutland as bombing raids were carried out on the non-existent German bases in Finland.
The Finnish military quickly retreated, but the German military stayed to fight.
Germany fired their lasers at Russian aircraft launched by carriers, downing ten of them. 75 German airplanes and 25 helicopters then began to attack the six submarines the Russians sent.
Russian aircraft. The lack of burning German planes in the background proves this was not taken during the war.
Russia managed to neutralize the charges dropped and then began to destroy the 100 aircraft devoted to defeating the submarines at an astonishing rate, prompting Germany to send in 55 more airplanes, which the Russian military was easily able to handle. Germany then sent in 120 more helicopters and at least 300 more aircraft to hold off the Russians. Again, the Russian military was easily able to handle the German onslaught. By this point, the German carriers were sunk, Russia has air superiority while the Russian ships and submarines were about to decimate the German main fleet. Germany then surrendered.
Armistice[]
After the Russian Invasion, the terms of a peace deal were never formally made, although it was generally assumed that Finland managed to take part of Finnmark and Troms.